"So how's work?", your friend asks. "Good", you say, "really good". But as you walk away from your coffee date, you're wondering if that was really accurate.
It's Wednesday afternoon, and the day's been OK. You've attended a couple of meetings, you've checked and replied to lots of emails, you've got tasks in your calendar that you've been working on. Which is fine, right? You've been productive, and you're productive like this most days.
But you also have a nagging feeling that it's not fine. You were excited about this job when you started. That you'd be able to contribute what you know to some great projects. That you'd develop and grow professionally. Where did that excitement go?
This is a common experience in the modern workplace, especially in the public sector at the moment. But when you invest in your career wellbeing, that feeling of excitement at work and satisfaction with your job starts to return. You go from surviving to thriving.
Making progress at work every day
Just surviving looks like being slowed down by your own scattered attention, because your day is dominated by emails and the group chat. Or by your lack of clarity on why you're doing what you're doing. Having lots of conversations in the course of a week, but not seeing much tangible progress towards a planned deliverable.
But when you're thriving, work feels easier and every day brings noticeable steps forward. You have open lines of communication with your colleagues and leaders, and are buoyed by their support and energy. You have autonomy to make calls about your work, and how you do it, and feel the buzz of making a significant contribution.
Reducing stress and burnout at work
Buzzing is definitely not what you feel when you're just surviving at work. While having days that are consistent and without drama is a good thing, feeling that work is one long procession of 'same old, same old' without any variety leaves you bored. And when you notice that your work stories have become repeated tales of stressful events, 'challenging' interactions with colleagues, and the wild tasks that keep appearing to hinder your progress on more important work, it's draining (and a little bit embarrassing). And that chronic bad stress can put you at risk of burnout.
Thriving, on the other hand, looks like varied work with tasks in your 'sweet spot' that let you enter a 'flow' state on a daily basis. (I mentioned flow in one of my earlier blog posts on job satisfaction.) You might have a heavy workload, but feel you have the ability to take regular recharge breaks, and your work feels in balance with your home and family life. There are still occasional stressful moments, but it's good stress, and you know how to head off any overwhelm and can call on your network to help.
Feeling job satisfaction
When you're just surviving, it can feel like you're pedalling hard, but staying in the exact same place in your capabilities. That the job that held so much promise at the interview, now gives you so few opportunities to contribute what you know how to do and to make a difference. Within a team that is a collection of individuals who tolerate each other, rather than being a unit that has team fun and team pride.
You’re thriving and have career wellbeing when you're able to do work you like and are good at every day. When you feel that you are being given opportunities to learn and grow. When your work has meaning and will impact other people or help an important cause. And when your team is a group of people who you 'fit' with, who respect each other, and with whom you happily pull together around shared goals.
What makes the difference to help you thrive at work
You often start a new job full of hope that you've finally landed in the right place, or at least someplace better than where you were before. But if it's in the same sector, public or otherwise, the same system will be operating, and as you're still you, before long, you can end up feeling that same dissatisfaction you had before.
It takes understanding the system at the detailed level, the obvious challenges in your workplace and job, as well as those that lurk less visibly beneath the surface. And it takes being honest and gently asking yourself how much you want to change (or not), any beliefs you may have that are limiting you, any fears you have. Then, out of all the possible solutions, identifying which are the exact right ones that are a fit for you, to move the needle. And that can be hard on your own.
The many good books now available about the world of work are a great place to start. Many amazing organisational psychologists and others have researched this space, and reading their findings can be illuminating. If it's helpful, I wrote a blog post recently about five of my favourite books from the last year which points you in the right direction.
But books, TED Talks, Tiktoks, even training courses, if intended for a broad audience, might not quite land for you and your specific situation. This is where coaching can work well.
Coaching is an opportunity to unpack what's going on and lay it all on the table. With someone who understands your situation, who lends you some extra confidence and encouragement, meets you where you are right now, and works with you to pinpoint the right solutions to get you moving again.
Surviving or thriving, where are you on the continuum?
Even knowing all that, it can be hard to make a decision to get some dedicated help. But if you were still 'Good, really good' (but not actually really good) in a year's time, would that be OK with you? Or would you really rather be able to say 'Work's great, I'm loving it'?
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I help professional women in the public sector make more progress in their work, reduce their stress and avoid burnout, and feel more satisfied at the end of the day. I write a weekly-ish blog, to share the action-enabling gems from the research evidence I come across in my reading. I offer both topic-focused and personalised coaching, and I've just launched a new 1:1 online coaching workshop focusing on tackling your work overwhelm. Email me at marie-louise@fireflycoaching.nz, I'd love to hear from you.