Do you have little things you do as part of your work day that help it to go more smoothly? Or at least feel better? Things that inject a little bit of who you are, what you like, that help you to be your best self? You could call them rituals.
When I hear the word ritual, the first thing that comes to mind is someone lighting a candle before they do yoga. Or the ‘Ding!’ of a bell at the end of a meditation.
I’m sure those things are rituals, but they’re not really the type of rituals I do. When I do yoga, there are no candles in sight. (They might set off the smoke detectors, anyway!) And when I occasionally (twice a year?!) make time to meditate, I always find the bell at the end of the guided meditation jolts me too much out of my newly relaxed state.
The type of rituals I have don’t draw on any Eastern religion or culture or spiritual way of living, and they’re quite a bit more ordinary. Actually, you could probably call them ‘habits’, or simply just things that are part of my daily routine. Except that I think of habits as things I do without thinking too much about them. Whereas, my rituals are something I do very consciously.
They’re certain little things I choose to do each day, even look forward to doing each day, that break up my work sessions – and I miss them if I can’t do them. And, while I do have a strong interest – particularly as a part-time worker – in maximising my productivity, in most cases that’s not why I started doing them.
I’ve added them one by one over time, in most cases because they help to reduce ‘friction’. In other words, they make my day feel easier and more pleasant. They protect or boost my energy and ability to focus. And they help me to switch gears between the multiple different modes I’m in each day – researcher, writer, trainer, child wrangler, social life organiser, Keeper of the Family Schedule, sports coach, nutrition supplier… (I’m fairly confident this will be a familiar state of affairs for other working parents.)
I was reading Self-Confidence by writer and philosopher Charles Pépin last weekend. He writes that he sees rituals as things that create space between people and the “hysteria of the times”, space for connecting “with our inner selves”, and a feeling of respite from “the breakneck pace of our lives.”
If that’s the case – and that definition rings true, for me at least – rituals take on even more value. Especially, right here, right now, at this time in history. When parts of the world are descending into combative chaos, climate change is wreaking havoc across our own country (even as I write), and keeping bills paid, food on the table and petrol in the car adds a new juggling act.
The first ritual of my day is to spend 10 minutes thinking and journaling. It’s a bit like meditation, except better, because I don’t end up cross at myself for not being able to keep a lid on my thoughts. Wandering thoughts are definitely allowed, and it’s an opportunity to reflect on the day before – with the mental distance and extra perspective that comes with ‘sleeping on it’. (Or not sleeping, as the case may be. But that’s probably a whole other blog post.) After ‘checking in’ on myself and how I feel, I think about what I’m grateful for, as gratitude has been shown through research to contribute to feeling happy, and happiness has also been shown through studies to be an important factor in achievement! I also try and notice any particular successes I had, any particular worries I’ve been ruminating over, and the three things I most want to accomplish during my workday to come – Chris Bailey’s “Rule of 3” from his book Hyperfocus.
My second ritual of the day comes at approximately 8.30am, once partner and child have been shooed out of the house, because I work from home and they count as noisy distractions! I quietly make a pot of sencha – Japanese green tea. I lived in Japan for two years when I was 22, and I’ve been addicted to it ever since. And ever since coffee started giving me palpitations, it’s been my one caffeine hit every day. I could tell myself I’m drinking it for its antioxidants, that apparently protect against some cancers, but really, it’s the flavour and the gentle nudge that it gives my brain and mental acuity.
After a couple of good sessions of ‘deep work’ (or email clearing), I’ll surface around 11.45am or 12-lunchtime and step outside. This is my third workday ritual – though maybe it’s a stretch calling it that. On days when the sun is shining gloriously, the birds are out, the timber of the deck is dry and warm, the bees are buzzing, it feels more like playing hooky. But there’s a good reason for it. It gets me some fresh air, gives my eyes a chance to focus on something other than a computer monitor, lets me check in on my tangle of a garden, and generally reminds me that there’s a whole world out there that’s nothing to do with the trials and tribulations of trying to make a living. Studies by Marc Berman and others have shown interacting with nature improves directed attention, and your mood, and can help with depression and ADHD, and I certainly come inside feeling more buoyant. It sets me up for the afternoon.
Before I finish work in the afternoon, I try to spend a few minutes reviewing my day – what I got to, what I didn’t, and what I need to carry forward to the next day – though I’m willing to admit I don’t always get to it. This is a ritual that I’ve actually been doing for years, and it falls firmly into the productivity space, because it sets me up for the next morning. If my calendar’s already blocked out with the things I have to accomplish, there’s no umming and ahhing about what to get cracking on (once I’ve had my green tea, obviously). And if you did a more comprehensive version of this at the end of your week, it might look like Rick Pastoor’s “Friday recap”, in his book Grip: The Art of Working Smart And Getting to What Matters Most.
Right on the heels of my daily review ritual, is my last workday ritual – walking away from work, as fast as possible, down to the school gate (because somehow I always manage to leave several minutes later than I should)! This ritual isn’t actually about supporting better work then, or making work more pleasant, but does help me switch gears, mentally and physically, for the coming afternoon in ‘Parent Mode’. I get a bit more of that fresh air and an oxygen top-up, I get in some cardio, and it’s a 25-minute chance to wear my headphones to listen to something fun rather than cancelling out noise that’s not. Emily and Amelia Nagoski list physical exercise, based on the research evidence, as their number one way of “completing your stress cycle” in their Burnout book. So it’s a ritual that’s actually multi-faceted in terms of its benefits.
So, there they are — five little rituals that, taken together, shape my day considerably more than their diminutive size would suggest they might. None of them take long. None of them are expensive. None of them require a candle. But, like beads on a necklace, they give me a thread to follow through the day — something that’s (mostly) consistent, from day to day, regardless of what else is going on. What thread do you follow through your day? Or is there small ritual you've been meaning to start?